Reason to Under Achieve No. 6 – Lack of Support from a Mastermind Alliance
When you set big goals for yourself you need support to help you achieve them. As I mentioned earlier you will have the nay sayers lining up to tell you why something won’t work, but what you need is positive, affirming support.
Mastermind Groups or Mastermind Alliances as they are sometimes known is one of the best ways. This group will be a network of people who see more in you than you see in yourself. They will be big thinkers, supporters, like minded people that you can rely on to hold up the highest vision of who you are.
The question here is “Where can I find an alliance that will support me in achieving my dreams?”
What happens in a mastermind alliance will vary, some groups contain people from different professions who come together to offer their expertise to each other.
How your group works and what it does is ultimately down to the group. The most important thing to remember is that dreams are not achieved alone. Even if you work alone it is important to your business that you have contact with others if you intend to make money!
Knowing that you have your own alliance that is available to you whenever you find yourself in need of motivation, or experiencing a challenge, or when you just want to share a success is an important and worthwhile investment of your time.
Reason to Under Achieve No 7 – Wasting Precious Life On Regrets
We all have things that didn’t work out. Things that we would have done differently, and it’s always good to take a long hard look at the impact our actions have in our life and on other people.
It’s also good to spend some time in reflection looking at what you will do differently next time and how you can learn from your mistakes.
But ultimately, you have to LET IT GO! Let go of the past, focus on what’s great in your life right now, and create a compelling future for what will be.
Every minute, hour, week, month and year you waste on blaming, shaming, criticising and regret does nothing but reduce the happiness you can experience in your own life. It robs you of your passion to move forward and look at “what’s next?”
The question here is “What stories can I give up about events in the past, the giving up of which will help me to move forward?”
Take a long hard look at the business deals that didn’t work out, the partner that didn’t support, the people that “did stuff to you.” Are you ready to let it all go?
This is not about blame. Maybe what they did was wrong, but by you continually focusing on it that will not make it right, or change what happened. Is it time to find another way?
Reason to Under Achieve No. 8 – I’m Not Good Enough
This has to be one of the biggest barriers for women. Growing up believing that they were not good enough and it took me years to work through this particular “demon”.
Thinking, feeling and believing that you are not good enough is confidence enemy number 1! You need to make a commitment to actively seek personal and professional help to overcome it.
The question here is “How long have I believed I am not good enough and what am I going to do to change this story? (Which is totally not true I might add!)”
Overcoming this belief is a work in progress, but the reward far outweighs the “work”
I want to end this with a plea. If you are a woman with children please watch what you say to them, children are literal creatures and will believe every thought you put in their head.
Please nourish them with positive affirmations about being capable, lovable and able to succeed at whatever they put their minds too.
And please no longer allow other people to indulge in calling your child(ren) names. Not even the little pet “you clumsy thing, you” that Grandparents may lovingly say when they drop the plate of cookies.
Growing up believing you are not good enough is one of the most damaging things to go through. Having said that, when you are willing to work through it, it can also provide you with the energy to be the best that you can be.
Reason to Under Achieve No. 9 – I tried for a while but it didn’t work.
I am always amazed at the number of times clients say to me “but Diane. I have been thinking positively for 4 weeks now and nothings working!”
Let’s have some reality here shall we! When you spend 10, 15, 30 years thinking and behaving a certain way, your way of being does not magically shift overnight! Now whilst I am an optimist and I believe that anything is possible, even I have a limit on this one!!!!
Changing your mindset takes time, taking yourself from negative thinking to positive is a journey.
The question here is “What action(s) am I ready to take to ensure I effortlessly move through these stages with every new learning experience?”
In the world of personal development you will go through many stages and you can never measure exactly how long each stage will take.
If you read a book a year chances are it will take you a long while, if you read a book a week, listen to audios, attend seminars and take action and use what you have learnt, chances are you will move through them very quickly.
During this journey you will always be taking 20 steps forward and 5 steps back. This is the way of life. Embrace and accept it, rather than make it wrong. Each step back will allow you to go even further forward if you take the time to listen to it.
Reason to Under Achieve No. 10 – Lack of vision and focus!
I won’t hit you with all the clichés here! You know the ones I mean. A ship without a sail, a house without foundations, an aeroplane without a pilot type clichés that are all used to tell you the same thing. You must know where you are going if you want to be clear on the fact that you get there!
Having a clear direction to go in, feeling the emotional high when life has purpose, being focused on your desires, these are all things that provide excitement, fulfilment, peace and happiness to life.
It doesn’t mean you then stay moving in this direction forever. Your direction will change as you grow and you will gain the strength to flow with it if you are willing to.
What is your vision? It could be a personal one for yourself and your life, or it could be a professional one for your business. What do you want to accomplish by the end of 2007? 2010? 2020? Do you know yet? If not, why not.
If you are hoping that you will get a magical answer that will instantly provide you with the answers you seek then I have some good news and some bad news!
The bad news is there is no magical answer!
The good news is, the best person to tell you what your life purpose is, is you! Yes, that’s right, not the book on how to do it (although it provides great guidance), but you.
Inside you is the answer you seek, all you need to do is begin to listen to it. And here’s some more good news. Your purpose isn’t something you work towards achieving; it is something that lives in your life every single day. You may not have connected with it fully, but it is alive and well within you.
It really is time for you to take back your power. Stop thinking the book will give it to you, stop thinking your Life Coach will give it to you, stop thinking the seminar leader will give it to you. They are just tools, facilitators, catalysts that are there to help you bring it out of yourself.
If you believe “You don’t know” your vision can I invite you to stop lying to yourself. Yes you do. You always have. You may not know how to bring it out of yourself, or articulate it, now that’s something different. But you know what it is.
Are you using “I don’t know” as a way to stay stuck? To ensure you never have to work towards achieving anything, but that you have a great excuse and reason why not?
The question here is “Am I ready to connect to my vision?”
Focus is the other area that women struggle with. We move from one thing to another, thinking that the thing we are working on “is it” only to discover years later that you are unfulfilled again.
When you have found what you love to do, when you have connected with what you are passionate about, every action you need to take is easy. It’s easy, its fun and you love it. You wouldn’t want to do anything else.
But hey, relax, remember this is a journey, and the journey would be far too easy if we all just hit upon what we love instantly. The important thing is you are doing something about being unhappy. You are, aren’t you?